First Sunset

The first night in our new home the sunset put on a spectacular show for us! We, however, were too exhausted to appreciate the view from our windows! The move put me into energy and mental deficit that most likely will take me months to recover from! The last night of packing on Sept. 28th was full of weeping over the amount of things I still had left to do and what the impending future felt like! All signs were pointing to the desert but after being here a little over a week my heart is heavy with the loss of what my life was like! I don't recognize this life yet and the heaviness of the heat plus the long distances I need to drive to get to any store has me in near hysterics most of the time. And then there is mom's memory loss! She doesn't recognize a lot of her possessions and the ones she remembers don't seem to exist.

This is a gated community where gate codes and/or transponders are required in order to get inside the complex and another set of keys to get into the mail room which is 1 mile from the house!!!! There are numerous glitches one being that the dryer needs an adaptor so that we can plug it into the wall! And of course the electricians are busy so laundry is piled to the ceiling! And don't get me started on the trash pick-up! The Waste Management company keeps running out of trash cans before they get to us but we at least got permission to put out 3 large plastic bags for tomorrows pick-up. It wasn't hard to decide which stinky trash to put into them. One is full of cat litter and the other two . . . and on and on . . . boring mundane stuff!

I didn't think that I'd be as disoriented as I seem to be about not being able to see the ocean on a daily basis and by the 89-104 temps that seem to be "below normal" for this time of year! Below normal?! What did I get myself into?!

This area of the desert has seen a huge spurt of growth over the last 3 years so a lot of the stores are new which is grand and I know that with time I will find my way around and start "seeing" the beauty of the desert, but right now I can't seem to dig my way out of the pity-pot. So, I'll go outside on the patio where there is a warm breeze and look at the stars, something I couldn't do on the Monterey Peninsula at any time of year.