Thursday, November 23, 2006
Something seemed to be missing in this palm tree grove. The rays of light provided a clue; an etheral play of light.
Wednesday, November 22, 2006
Bored with the same route I turned up Avenue 60 and down Jackson and then over to Van Buren, yep, the streets are named after Presidents!, and the next thing I knew I was surrounded on both sides of the road by Palms! Yikes! My worst nightmare is to be lost among palm trees. But to my surprise I was instantly drawn to this grove. Grabbing my camera off of the seat next to me I aimed it out of the car window. I was intrigued by the highlights on the tree trunks and the branches hanging from the trees on the left side. This shot is a bit off balance in that it seems to be begging me to wonder what the ground looks like, but then my eye travels to the top of the photo and I know longer care about what is missing.
The temps have finally dropped to the pleasant 70's this week! How marvelous is that?!
A favorite quote:
If the only prayer you ever say in your whole life is 'thank you', that would suffice.
Happy Thanksgiving Everyone!
Saturday, November 18, 2006
<< Palm trees on faux handmade paper. I need to work on some new items for my etsy.com shop! They now have a really cool set-up where you can place items into categories! Love it!
Life seems to have stopped back in August when the move to the desert started to fall into place because suddenly Thanksgiving is upon us! I feel like I've been in deep hibernation for months only to be thrust into the land known as November! Where did autumn go?! A friend recently said that she too lives in an area where there is only one season and that it is a bit disorienting. It's still in the 80's here. The warm temperatures plus the fact that I'm in the midst of an FM flare-up brought on by the faux wood desk (made from chemically treated pressed wood!) and stress over the family health issues aren't making coming out of hibernation an easy task. Hibernating sounds like the easy route to take. Brain fog and fatigue are my current guests, unwelcome ones to be sure, but I don't have the energy to send them packing.
Later: An encouraging sign! I sold a metal tag this evening on etsy.com! It took me hours to locate it along with some other items that are listed. While madly searching for the tag I ended up unpacking 3 more boxes of ephemera and art tools. Hopefully I'll get organized soon!
Thursday, November 16, 2006
The fabric was scanned into the computer and layered with a transparency image of a gate, tweaked some more and printed onto another piece of fabric. The fragement is ready for embellishing . . .
So long as we are loved by others I should say that we are almost indispensable; and no man is useless while he has a friend. - Robert Louis Stevenson
Tuesday, November 14, 2006
Since arriving in the desert I've spent more time running errands and taking care of medical emergencies and appointments than I ever considered possible. The belief that "life is an illusion" is becoming more apparent as the years go by. The desert feels like an illusion, one I continue to believe I can wake up from. I'm still so disoriented that every morning I try to shake off the illusion of living here. It's not that I dislike the area with any intensity its dealing with too many unfamiliar entities that has brought on the "grand despair." How the hospital is run, the new doctors, the set-up at the dialysis clinic and dealing with mom's disappearing brain cells while mine are on hiatus is more than I can cope with at the moment.
Yesterday was one of those days when floods of tears coursed down my cheeks every time I thought about all of the details I need to attend to; how can I manage them all?! I've never been enamored with the phone in fact I find the instrument intrusive and annoying! I'd rather speak to someone in person, but now I spend hours on the damned thing attempting to get the right kind of help for Stacy and mom and to un-do mistakes! I should be making about 5 calls today to Social Security and insurance companies but I could barely drag myself out of bed.
One of the symptoms of Fibromyalgia, other than pain, is brain fog and when it strikes I struggle with it in the same way I now watch mom try to figure out the most basic things like finding her wallet in a nearly empty purse. Suddenly her wallet doesn't look familiar. When I feel like I have for the last few days it's hard to believe that the brain fog will dissipate and I'll be able to semi-function again. Stress, the silent killer, is what pushes Fibro symptoms over the top so it's not surprising that the brain fog has reared up its ugly head once again!
My new 5 piece desk unit is finally together! Took me over a week to get it assembled and happily my SIL finished the last piece, the hutch, and then put all of the computer components, printers and scanner just where I wanted them. He also finally got the VCR/DVD player hooked up to the DVR unit in my bedroom! I unpacked 5 more boxes of ephemera and photos and am elated that they are now stored in filing cabinet drawers within easy reach of the new scanner. I need a refresher course on how to use the scanner that I've only used twice. But the missing brain cells are telling me that will have to wait. All-in-all I feel a bit more settled-in even though there are numerous boxes sitting in the walk-in closet and mucking up space in the garage! The nice thing about having one car is that I finally have storage space!
When the Camry blew-up a few weeks before the move everyone, including me, assumed that there was a new car in my future. We now know that that episode was a "smooth" transition of getting rid of one car so that not only would I continue doing all of the grocery shopping but that I would become the driver to and from the dialysis clinic now that mom isn't able to drive anymore. Talk about the universe taking care of details that might otherwise have been harder on everyone! Wouldn't it be grand though if more of the details were worked out at smoothly . . .
I had hoped to be able to start the Palm Tree photo series, but exhaustion has robbed me of energy in which to leave the house on non-dialysis days. Three days of getting ready to leave the house is more than I'm used to doing and when the days are combined with endless hours of running errands . . . Grabbing the camera out of my purse while driving seems to be about the only way I can photograph right now! The shots aren't noteworthy, but they might provide a sense of place . . .
Tuesday, November 07, 2006
Mom hasn't handled the move to the desert as well as we had hoped and if anything she's more agitated and lost. Large chunks of memory are missing and when each day begins I wonder what new person I'll be spending time with; she's definitely not the mother I once knew.